As a wedding celebrant I have the unique opportunity to be standing right there beside hundreds of couples as they take that huge leap into marriage and commit their lives, hopes and dreams to each other.
It's an interesting vantage point because over the years it has really demonstrated to me how we all love and commit to another in our own unique way. Some couples are laughing and joking, others are teary and nervous, and others are so focussed on each other they barely notice anyone else is even there!
No matter what kind of couple you are, the most important thing is that your wedding day really reflects who you are. Sure, it's a serious occasion and you might have lots of guests there, but when those people who know and love you walk away from your wedding thinking, that was so them, then that is what really counts.
So, if you and your partner are the kind of couple who joke and tease each other, your ceremony should really have that feel. If you and your partner are serious and romantic, then that should shine through in your wedding ceremony and the vows you say to each other.
But, there's one very important thing I always try to reinforce when I'm working with couples, no matter how they intend to approach their wedding day - MAKE SURE YOU TAKE A BREATH AND SOAK IT IN.
It is so easy to get caught up with all the noise, the details, the planning, who is where and whether everything is going to plan, but on that day, the most important thing is being there and being present with the person you love, in the moment, and committing your life to them. Even if small things go wrong, you'll still be married at the end of the day, which is the whole point of doing it!
Sometimes when I'm standing beside the groom (or the partner who is beside me) and the bride (or other partner) is about to walk down the aisle, I'll whisper, 'This is it. It's finally here. Look where you are.' and I'll hear them suck in a breath and hold it. The emotion, the excitement, the nervousness as their loved one is about to come and join them and take vows filled with promises of forever. It's a beautiful moment to be a part of and so very important for the couple.
Another opportunity to really soak it in is when signing the legal paperwork (if it's done that way in your country). The couple and celebrant go over to the signing table and the couple sit down. I often fuss around a little bit and give them a minute to chat and laugh and look at each other and then I'll say to them, Can you believe you're now married? and you see the way they look at each other in that moment. It's as if all the stress and worry melts away and their hopes and dreams and being set in motion.
There are also other opportunities to connect and bring yourself back to the moment throughout your wedding day. Every time it's feeling busy on the day, let that be a reminder to you to take a deep breath, look around you and commit it to your heart and memory. Squeeze your partners hand and let yourself feel the excitement of this life changing moment because in the coming years, and particularly in your older years, you will look back on this day and draw upon those feelings. it will become one of the defining moments of your life.
Good luck!
The Wedding Gurus xx
