Meditation for Bride's - de-stress before the big day!

Weddings are stressful. And for some, they can be REALLY stressful (particularly when you're dealing with family issues, bridal party fallout or any other number of things.

It's important to sometimes step back from the planning, the thinking and the lists, and take a breather to let yourself reset.

Looking after yourself and you mindset id really important and you want to head into your big day in a really good headspace.

So, we've created an easy to listen to 10 minute meditation especially for bride's who are feeling a bit of that overwhelm and just need a little reset.

Find a relaxing place, disconnect and give yourself this gift.

Enjoy!

(Warning - the narrator is Australian!)

Ditch the Bridezilla and be a total Bridecess

 

Yes we made it up, but ‘Bridecess’ is our new favourite word!

... July is upon us and it has prompted our thoughts to turn to wedding trends and ideas for 2023.

 Now this may be somewhat controversial given the society we live in, our love of good drama, and the popularity of some TV shows, but it is our belief (The Wedding Gurus) that

‘Bridezilla’ is well and truly OUT!

Being a bride has always carried with it a certain elegance and beauty that those of us who have not been lucky enough to walk down the aisle can only dream of experiencing.

We imagine ourselves moving graciously down the flower adorned aisle or pathway to join our fabulous waiting partner as all our guests and loved ones look on in awe and shed a tear in response to the heart warming exchange between the couple - the loves of their lives.

With this in mind, how then did it ever become fashionable to transform into what we know as 'Bridezilla'?

The word itself brings to mind a horrific picture: A bride in a huge flouncy dress screaming and frothing at the mouth as others try desperately to tame and calm her outbursts. Is it really ever pleasant to have people see us this way on what should be our time to really shine?

Lets be real. Do you honestly want to be seen as an out of control, screaming, nasty bride to be, so feared by not only your bridesmaids, but also your friends and family that by the time the big day arrives they would much rather suffocate you than be part of your special day?

Or do you want to aspire to the persona of someone like Princess Kate Middleton (see where the word Bridecess came from?) who showed courtesy and good manners to all those around her and pulled it all off with such elegance and class? (or if you don't want to go that far, which is understandable, just be someone that puts on a good show and makes people feel welcome!)

We want to convince every one of you to aspire to be a gorgeous and glowing bride, one that is calm, in control and who leaves every person in the room thinking what a perfect choice the groom/partner has made.

Let the singles wish they were you or wish they had found you first. Let the elderly people comment on your glow and your fun, while the married women wish they had been so fabulous on their wedding day. Let your parents burst with pride at what a great job they have done and your in-laws feel grateful for the daughter they are gaining. Let your bridesmaids feel excited and privileged to have such a great friend and to have had an absolutely fabulous time helping you with this wedding. But most of all ,let your partner feel that they are absolutely the luckiest person alive to be the one standing beside you.

So......ditch that old Bridezilla (its so 2015) and find your inner Bridecess. Your friends, family, bridesmaids and soon to be marriage partner will all thank you for it.

We’ve put together a few ways that we think you can achieve the true title of ‘Bridecess’

1. Accept the fact that things will go wrong, they always do but it is the way you react to it that will determine whether it complete ruins your wedding or is remembered as merely a road bump on the way to a perfect day.

2. Surround yourself with loving and supportive people who will be there to help you and remind you of the real meaning of the day.

3. Be organised, plan and work out every detail so that nothing can pop up and stress you out.

4. Scheduling 'you' time that does not involve wedding planning and is relaxing and uplifting.

5. Throw out all the old sayings you have heard –

"You cant please them all so just please yourself",

"You can pick your friends but you cant pick your relatives".

“Weddings are as stressful as a death in the family"

All of these statements carry some degree of truth, but if you approach wedding planning in this negative frame of mind you will feel nothing but stress and anxiety. Of course you have to think about your guests and wedding party, it’s primarily your day but they are all playing a part and deserve to enjoy it too.

6. Lastly but most importantly don’t forget that you are a couple and this is supposed to be the happiest day of both of your lives. Imagine how it feels to be a partner about to marry thier true love only to see her go from being a wonderful person to a total out of control train wreck.

Do you want your tantrums, tears and bad behaviour to be etched in the memories of your guests when they recall your wedding day? or do want them to be using you as their example when they begin planning their day?

Queens, you've got this. 

The Wedding Gurus

xxx

 

 

Wedding Rituals and Traditions - The Silent Flower Ritual (mothers)

The silent flower ritual is one of the simplest and most basic rituals that may be included in a wedding ceremony, but it’s significance and emotional depth are long remembered.

The silent flower ritual brings significance to the roles of the mothers on this special day, that may otherwise go unspoken and to all that they have contributed in the lives of the couple present. In nurturing, loving and caring for each of them and in being there to share this special day with them.

Once the guests are assembled and the groom and celebrant are waiting for the bride, the entrance music begins and the bride enters carrying her bouquet with 2 loose long stem flowers. As she approaches her groom on her father’s (or whoever is escorting her) arm, she lets go of him and walks silently over to her soon to be mother in law and hands her one of the flowers, giving her a kiss on the cheek. She then walks over to her own mother handing her a flower also and giving her a kiss on the cheek.

No words are said during the ritual and the bride then returns to her escort’s arm and continues to her groom.

The ritual, though silent, is very meaningful and brings a tear to the eyes of guests and of course the mothers. It is a truly wonderful way of honouring the mother’s role in the lives of the couple and their importance on this day. The mothers are always very pleased, particularly when they are not aware that it is going to take place.

The Wedding Gurus xx

Wedding Rituals and Traditions - The Wishing Stones

The Wishing Stone Ceremony

The ‘Wishing Stone' Ceremony is a wonderfully inclusive ritual to incorporate into your big day and is great for not just weddings, but any ceremony you may be considering.

I have performed it as part of a baby naming as well as for weddings. It basically involves using small polished stones, just large enough to write a small wish on if necessary.

Photo from: Intimateweddings.com

Usually the stones are given out by someone selected to perform the task (can be a great way of including children, by getting them to walk around and make sure everyone has a stone).

As the ceremony commences the guests are asked to hold the stones tightly and make a loving wish for the couple’s life together.

The stones can later be collected in a vase for the couple to keep as a memento of all of the wishes their loved ones and friends made for them or each person can be invited to come forward as part of the ceremony and place their stone – making their wish for the couple, in the vase.

Each stone represents a special wish that the couple can take with them to reflect on throughout their married life together.

Some couples may wish to go a little further and ask guests to write their wish on the stone, offering felt tipped pens for the guests and family to write their names and add their wish.

The Wedding Gurus xx

Wedding Rituals and Traditions - Dove Release

 

Including a Dove Release can be a beautiful and symbolic addition to any wedding ceremony. The symbolism is beautiful and the spectacle is even more so.

Celebrant:
"White doves mate for life and much like a married couple, sometimes the doves take flight and follow their own path for short periods of time, not tied to each other every moment of every passing day. But when the darkness sets in, whether their day’s journey has been together or apart, they both return to the safe place they know is home for the night, to each other.

The releasing of these white doves is a blessing to you both on this day. It is a reminder that while your lives, your paths and your other commitments may often lead you in opposite directions, you always have a place to come home to, to find each other and be one."

Release the doves

"As these doves fly they will carry for you and all of your loved ones here present, wishes for peace, love and hope for your future life together."

The Wedding Gurus xx

Finding the right wedding celebrant

When he gets down on one knee and pops that big question, for one amazing split second the world stops. The future flashes before your eyes and that flash usually involves a gorgeous dress, vibrant flowers and adoring eyes all focused on us. But…..unfortunately as plans begin to take hold and arrangements are booked the reality of how much works is involved in planning a wedding begins to set in.

Finding the right celebrant is sadly often given little thought initially and left to near last. Whether that is because it is perceived as a ‘less fun’ task or perhaps couples just find picking cakes and flowers more fun, but whatever the reason, finding the celebrant is something that should be given time and consideration and can mean the difference between having a fabulous day and having a disaster.

In selecting the celebrant for you it is really important that you have some idea of what you are looking for to begin with - male, female, older, younger, traditional, modern. You need to take some time to work these details out in advance and ensure that as a couple you are clear about what you are looking for.

So, why is it important to find the right celebrant? Well your celebrant will play a major role not only on the big day, but will be your main source of ideas, information and guidance on planning your ceremony. While a celebrants main objective is to help the couple to create a ceremony that reflects who they are, they also bring to it their own perspectives, beliefs and ideas on ceremony which can often impact substantially on the end result.

Some celebrants may be more traditional and believe that a ceremony should be a very serious and formal occasion while other celebrants may believe that a more easy going, casual and fun ceremony is perfectly acceptable.

In working with you they will bring these ideas to your ceremony in the planning stages that's why it is a good idea to take the time to select wisely.

Choosing someone to trust in guiding you to plan your big day can be a little daunting, so we’ve put together a few top tips to help you:

Tip 1: Do some research based on your initial decisions of male/female etc.

Tip 2: Select 3 who appear to fit all of your criteria and either call or email them for information. Remember to ask each one to provide you with an information pack (or an outline of the services they provide, fees, inclusions etc.)

Tip 3: Compare the 3 packs based on what is provided. Consider total cost and a rating of the information given. Pay careful attention to the price inclusions, all celebrants charge different amounts and provide different things for that price.

For example: Celebrant 1 charges an all inclusive price of $500 including signing table, all documents, travel in metro area, PA use etc. Celebrant 2 charges $400, however there is a $50 fee for a table, $70 for the PA, $50 for documents and travel charged per kilometer. It’s easy to see the initial price as being the best only to discover that there are lots of ‘add ons’

Tip 4: Choose the celebrant who provides everything you are looking for at the fairest price and who you feel will best work with you to create your dream ceremony.

Tip 5: Make contact with them for an initial introduction or meeting to see if your personalities match and that they understand your vision for your day.

When you meet with the celebrant you will soon know if they are right for you, however if you feel they are not suitable simply go back to your top 3 list and organise another meeting.

We have all heard the old saying "you get what you pay for" and like anything else this is true when it comes to weddings. Very experienced and knowledgeable celebrants charge a reasonable fee for the service that they provide to couples and the time and effort that they spend personalising ceremonies to ensure your ceremony is exactly as you envisioned it to be.

While there are many cheap options available couples need to ensure that they are meeting the legal requirements and consider the standard they expect for their wedding day. Be sure to ask friends and family for recommendations as chances are if they come highly recommended, they are providing fabulous service.

We hope this has helped you to find the right celebrant for you and don't forget to check out The Wedding Gurus preferred celebrants page by clicking this link:

The Wedding Gurus

xx

 

Wedding Rituals & Traditions - Our version of a Rune Stone Ceremony

The ‘Stone Ceremony’ is a tradition that takes us back to a much simpler time, when gold was far less affordable and not readily available to hard working people. Instead of an exchange of rings, the bride and groom would cast stones, etched with ancient Nordic runic symbols, into a nearby water source, most commonly a river, lake or sea.

While couples today can usually afford and easily access rings to celebrate their nuptials, the meaning and sentiment behind the casting of the stones can be a wonderful addition to a wedding ceremony. This ritual can be performed in either of its traditional settings or easily adapted to the modern era, with the use of a fountain, pond or something similar and the stones can be made by the couple themselves or purchased online.

***

Requirements: 2 stones, a river or brook (or a pond)

Example:

“Many early settlers on Australian soil had very little wealth and did not have access to the fine things that life now has to offer. They could not afford the symbolic presentation and exchange of rings that we see at a modern wedding ceremony. To show their love, eternal commitment and to confirm their vows, they would instead each cast a stone into a nearby river or ocean. The water was a natural and lasting reminder that symbolised their intention of remaining together forever, while the tides of time ebbed and flowed over their lives, with joy and sorrow, highs, lows and great love. John and Alice will now cast two stones into the brook behind us. The stones they have chosen for this ceremony have been etched with ancient Nordic symbols, called 'Runes'.

The use of Rune stones today is deliberate and John and Alice have chosen the symbols that are significant for them. Rune stones hold strong meanings and symbolise the merging of past cultures, with the joining together of these two lives as one.

The red stone, carved with the rune 'Berkana'.

This is a rune of new birth and new beginnings. Although it can be indicative of an actual birth or marriage it can also refer to personal growth and development and prosperity. It can indicate the start of something special and the cleansing of doubts before moving forward.

The Gold stone, carved with the rune 'Ansuz',

Represents blessing and joy, a time for new beginnings and to expect the unexpected. It offers harmony, order and Wisdom.  These symbols remind us that, we must always move forward and openly accept the unexpected things that life may cast our way. We must ride the ebbs and flows of the tide together.

John and Alice, please now cast your stones.

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We hope you enjoy and feel a sense of connection to place when using this type of ritual in you ceremony. If you do use it, we'd love to see some pics!

The Wedding Gurus xx