What music should you have for your wedding ceremony

Music is a huge part of your wedding ceremony and to be honest, it really sets the tone and feel for the day. Live music is always amazing, but for some (many) couples, money is just too tight and it can't make the budget. 

It's really important to be clear about what options are available when it comes to the use of music on your big day. 

The following options might help you out:

Option 1.  Use the celebrant's PA system. 

Most celebrants will have their own PA system for you to play your music from (be sure to ask them in your planning meeting). 

On the day and you can just bring along a phone or iPad (or whatever device you have your songs on) to plug into the PA. 

Note: with this option, you may need someone from your group to press the play and stop buttons as the celebrant will be up the front with you and not near the PA and may not have a remote control. The celebrant can easily give the person a quick run through of what to press before the ceremony starts.

If you choose to play from a device, you might want to create 3 separate playlists. This is best done using an app like Spotify premium (no ads!) and downloading the playlist to the device in case there are any wifi issues at your ceremony location.

The playlists can be put into the following categories for ease of playing.

1.     Before – this is a playlist with about 10 songs that can be played in the 30 minutes or so while guests are arriving. This sets a nice tone and feel for the ceremony.

2.     Entrance – this is the entrance song for the bride/groom and bridal party if they are entering in the traditional way. This can be 1 song or 2 if you want the bridesmaids to have a different song from the bride.

3.     Signing – this is a playlist of about 5 songs to be played while the couple and their witnesses are signing the legal documents. It allows the guest to enjoy the moment and the atmosphere.

Option 2. Instead of using the celebrant's PA system, you can bring along a portable speaker of your own to play the music. You can have a friend look after setting it up and pressing play and stop. This options also means that you can test your music etc before the big day and give the friend a run-through.

Option 3. You can book an audio person to handle all of the sound/mic stuff for the ceremony on the day. this means you can relax and not worry about a thing!

Option 4. You can hire a live musician for your ceremony. This creates a fabulous atmosphere and is the best option if you can afford it. 

No matter which option you choose, putting a bit of time and planning into your ceremony music will ensure that you and your guests really set the tone for a fun and gorgeous day.

The Wedding Gurus x

Wedding Rituals and Traditions - Song of the Bride (Romania)

There are a treasure trove of rituals and traditions that originate from Romania and people from different regions practice these in varied forms. The important ceremonial rituals practiced as part of a wedding are heavily dependant upon which region the couple come from.

One ritual/tradition that we came across takes place in the hours leading up to the wedding when the bride is preparing for the day. While she is dressing, the bridesmaids and best friends all gather and assist her.  This is a very important part of the preparation and can be a very emotional and moving moment for the bride and those closest to her. 

As they prepare her for her ceremony a song, "Say farewell bride to your family and house"- "Ia-ti mireasa ziua buna" is played and with an overflow of emotion, is often accompanied by tears and embraces  from all present. We found a rough translation of the lyrics:

Song of the Bride:
Say goodbye bride to your mother, to your father
To your sisters, to your brothers, to your garden with flowers
To your friends and neighbours, to the games or lover
Cry bride, today is the day
It's time to forget your father and love your husband
To forget your mother and to love your mother- in- law
To forget about your sisters and to love your sisters-in-law
 
You will go with your husband and you will leave behind everything you had.

Today with many couples living together before they are married, much of this significance can be lost, but for those who are coming from their parents home to join their husband in a new home and a new life, this rite of passage is still very special.

The Wedding Gurus xx

 

Wedding Rituals and Traditions - Paying tribute to the traditional owners of the land

Acknowledgement of the traditional owners of the land - Australian Version

I thought I might share this with you as I have been on occasion asked to begin a ceremony with an acknowledgement of the traditional owners of the land upon which we have stood.

Please note: you must only do an Acknowledgement of Country and not a Welcome to Country. A Welcome can only be done by a traditional owner.

An acknowledgement is a great way of paying respect to those who have come before us and can be done whether or not you have an indigenous background. The two examples here are from one particular area (South Australia), using specific groups, but wherever you are in the world, you can easily use similar wording to pay respect and honour the traditional owners of the land on which you stand.

It is believed that paying tribute brings good luck by ensuring that you are beginning on a positive note.

“We acknowledge and respect the traditional custodians whose ancestral lands we are meeting upon here today. We acknowledge the deep feelings of attachment and relationship of Aboriginal peoples to country. We also pay respects to the cultural authority of Aboriginal peoples visiting/attending from other areas of South Australia/Australia present here.”

OR

“We would like to acknowledge this land that we meet on today is the traditional lands of the Kaurna people and that we respect their spiritual relationship with their country. We also acknowledge the Kaurna people as the custodians of the greater Adelaide region and that their cultural and heritage beliefs are still important to the living Kaurna people today.”

If you are thinking of adding something like this to your ceremony, or are assisting a couple who would like to have something similar included, be sure to check the details of the traditional owners of the land that you will be performing the ceremony on.

Also check out another of our rituals/traditions - a traditional smoking ceremony.

The Wedding Gurus xxEMAIL THISSHARE TO TWITTER

Meditation for Bride's - de-stress before the big day!

Weddings are stressful. And for some, they can be REALLY stressful (particularly when you're dealing with family issues, bridal party fallout or any other number of things.

It's important to sometimes step back from the planning, the thinking and the lists, and take a breather to let yourself reset.

Looking after yourself and you mindset id really important and you want to head into your big day in a really good headspace.

So, we've created an easy to listen to 10 minute meditation especially for bride's who are feeling a bit of that overwhelm and just need a little reset.

Find a relaxing place, disconnect and give yourself this gift.

Enjoy!

(Warning - the narrator is Australian!)

Ditch the Bridezilla and be a total Bridecess

 

Yes we made it up, but ‘Bridecess’ is our new favourite word!

... July is upon us and it has prompted our thoughts to turn to wedding trends and ideas for 2023.

 Now this may be somewhat controversial given the society we live in, our love of good drama, and the popularity of some TV shows, but it is our belief (The Wedding Gurus) that

‘Bridezilla’ is well and truly OUT!

Being a bride has always carried with it a certain elegance and beauty that those of us who have not been lucky enough to walk down the aisle can only dream of experiencing.

We imagine ourselves moving graciously down the flower adorned aisle or pathway to join our fabulous waiting partner as all our guests and loved ones look on in awe and shed a tear in response to the heart warming exchange between the couple - the loves of their lives.

With this in mind, how then did it ever become fashionable to transform into what we know as 'Bridezilla'?

The word itself brings to mind a horrific picture: A bride in a huge flouncy dress screaming and frothing at the mouth as others try desperately to tame and calm her outbursts. Is it really ever pleasant to have people see us this way on what should be our time to really shine?

Lets be real. Do you honestly want to be seen as an out of control, screaming, nasty bride to be, so feared by not only your bridesmaids, but also your friends and family that by the time the big day arrives they would much rather suffocate you than be part of your special day?

Or do you want to aspire to the persona of someone like Princess Kate Middleton (see where the word Bridecess came from?) who showed courtesy and good manners to all those around her and pulled it all off with such elegance and class? (or if you don't want to go that far, which is understandable, just be someone that puts on a good show and makes people feel welcome!)

We want to convince every one of you to aspire to be a gorgeous and glowing bride, one that is calm, in control and who leaves every person in the room thinking what a perfect choice the groom/partner has made.

Let the singles wish they were you or wish they had found you first. Let the elderly people comment on your glow and your fun, while the married women wish they had been so fabulous on their wedding day. Let your parents burst with pride at what a great job they have done and your in-laws feel grateful for the daughter they are gaining. Let your bridesmaids feel excited and privileged to have such a great friend and to have had an absolutely fabulous time helping you with this wedding. But most of all ,let your partner feel that they are absolutely the luckiest person alive to be the one standing beside you.

So......ditch that old Bridezilla (its so 2015) and find your inner Bridecess. Your friends, family, bridesmaids and soon to be marriage partner will all thank you for it.

We’ve put together a few ways that we think you can achieve the true title of ‘Bridecess’

1. Accept the fact that things will go wrong, they always do but it is the way you react to it that will determine whether it complete ruins your wedding or is remembered as merely a road bump on the way to a perfect day.

2. Surround yourself with loving and supportive people who will be there to help you and remind you of the real meaning of the day.

3. Be organised, plan and work out every detail so that nothing can pop up and stress you out.

4. Scheduling 'you' time that does not involve wedding planning and is relaxing and uplifting.

5. Throw out all the old sayings you have heard –

"You cant please them all so just please yourself",

"You can pick your friends but you cant pick your relatives".

“Weddings are as stressful as a death in the family"

All of these statements carry some degree of truth, but if you approach wedding planning in this negative frame of mind you will feel nothing but stress and anxiety. Of course you have to think about your guests and wedding party, it’s primarily your day but they are all playing a part and deserve to enjoy it too.

6. Lastly but most importantly don’t forget that you are a couple and this is supposed to be the happiest day of both of your lives. Imagine how it feels to be a partner about to marry thier true love only to see her go from being a wonderful person to a total out of control train wreck.

Do you want your tantrums, tears and bad behaviour to be etched in the memories of your guests when they recall your wedding day? or do want them to be using you as their example when they begin planning their day?

Queens, you've got this. 

The Wedding Gurus

xxx

 

 

Wedding Rituals and Traditions - The Silent Flower Ritual (mothers)

The silent flower ritual is one of the simplest and most basic rituals that may be included in a wedding ceremony, but it’s significance and emotional depth are long remembered.

The silent flower ritual brings significance to the roles of the mothers on this special day, that may otherwise go unspoken and to all that they have contributed in the lives of the couple present. In nurturing, loving and caring for each of them and in being there to share this special day with them.

Once the guests are assembled and the groom and celebrant are waiting for the bride, the entrance music begins and the bride enters carrying her bouquet with 2 loose long stem flowers. As she approaches her groom on her father’s (or whoever is escorting her) arm, she lets go of him and walks silently over to her soon to be mother in law and hands her one of the flowers, giving her a kiss on the cheek. She then walks over to her own mother handing her a flower also and giving her a kiss on the cheek.

No words are said during the ritual and the bride then returns to her escort’s arm and continues to her groom.

The ritual, though silent, is very meaningful and brings a tear to the eyes of guests and of course the mothers. It is a truly wonderful way of honouring the mother’s role in the lives of the couple and their importance on this day. The mothers are always very pleased, particularly when they are not aware that it is going to take place.

The Wedding Gurus xx

Wedding Rituals and Traditions - The Wishing Stones

The Wishing Stone Ceremony

The ‘Wishing Stone' Ceremony is a wonderfully inclusive ritual to incorporate into your big day and is great for not just weddings, but any ceremony you may be considering.

I have performed it as part of a baby naming as well as for weddings. It basically involves using small polished stones, just large enough to write a small wish on if necessary.

Photo from: Intimateweddings.com

Usually the stones are given out by someone selected to perform the task (can be a great way of including children, by getting them to walk around and make sure everyone has a stone).

As the ceremony commences the guests are asked to hold the stones tightly and make a loving wish for the couple’s life together.

The stones can later be collected in a vase for the couple to keep as a memento of all of the wishes their loved ones and friends made for them or each person can be invited to come forward as part of the ceremony and place their stone – making their wish for the couple, in the vase.

Each stone represents a special wish that the couple can take with them to reflect on throughout their married life together.

Some couples may wish to go a little further and ask guests to write their wish on the stone, offering felt tipped pens for the guests and family to write their names and add their wish.

The Wedding Gurus xx